How Autistic Women Can Overcome Burnout and Live Joyful Lives with Carole Jean Whittington

In this heart-opening chat, I sit down with the incredible Carole Jean Whittington—an autistic ADHDer with a big brain and an even bigger heart—to dive deep into the messy, magical world of burnout, identity, and what it really takes to feel like yourself again.

We talk about the kind of burnout that isn’t just “I need a nap” tired, it’s the “who even am I anymore?” flavour. The kind that sneaks in through a lifetime of masking, micro-traumas, and pushing through when your nervous system’s quietly (or not-so-quietly) screaming “nope.”

Carole introduces her brilliant (and slightly cheeky) Spicy Scale for autistic burnout—from mild sizzle to full-on scorched—and we talk about:

💗 Why burnout in neurodivergent folks is often misunderstood (and can start way earlier than you'd think)

💗 How to tell if you’re stuck in the “restoration illusion” (aka pretending you’re fine when your body’s still fried)

💗 The massive importance of emotional safety (yes, even the invisible kind)

💗 What happens when we can’t name our emotions—and how alexithymia plays a role

💗 The surprisingly powerful role of breath, nourishment, and nervous system regulation in real, sustainable recovery

💗 And the absolute necessity of community when you’re trying to find your way back to yourself

This one’s full of personal stories, practical insights, and lots of gentle permission to not be “fine.” Because healing isn’t about fixing yourself—it’s about remembering who you really are underneath the burnout, the masking, and the hustle.

Key Takeaways:

• Autistic burnout can begin as early as age four and is often misunderstood.

• Burnout for autistic individuals goes deeper than general fatigue; it can lead to a loss of skills.

• Emotional safety is crucial for preventing and recovering from burnout.

• Many autistic individuals experience micro traumas that accumulate over time.

• Self-discovery requires energy and resources, which are often depleted in burnout.

• Understanding one's neurodiversity is key to navigating life challenges.

• Recognizing early signs of burnout is crucial for prevention.

• Emotional processing is essential for recovery from burnout.

• There is hope for recovery from burnout, no matter how severe.

  
  
  
  

Skip ahead to what you need…

00:00 Introduction to Autistic Identity and Health Challenges

06:02 Understanding Autistic Burnout and Its Impact

12:06 The Spicy Scale of Burnout

17:52 Restoration Illusion Trap and Self-Discovery

23:45 Understanding Burnout Symptoms

29:07 Internal vs External Signs of Burnout

35:13 Processing Emotions and Seeking Support

39:57 Breath and Nourishment as Healing Tools

45:50 Resources for Recovery and Community Support

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DISCLAIMER: Everything mentioned in this podcast is only my/my guests’ opinion and should not be a substitute for seeing a medical professional. Please seek advice from your doctor and confirm with them that they are happy for you to implement something you heard on the podcast.